Amy Winehouse was right. Around midnight those memories bombard my mind. I need relief from him. It's there but I don't want it. It's almost as if he's become intrinsically bound to my inner most thoughts. I would say extrinsic, but he has been assimilated. I wonder if he remembered to say happy sweetest day to his sister? I don't celebrate it but he is an Ohioan.
Lol @ remembering our "Michelle and Barack" conversation in the parking lot. "I could be like Michelle. I bet she remembers his schedule for him. I'm always remembering things for you." He laughs and agrees- he knows he's forgetful at times.
It will sound crazy with the way he's treated me, but I see an "Obama" in him. No no, not necessarily the President (well maybe), but a great man. A wonderfully accomplished, God-fearing man. I see a leader, internationally known. I see a father that his sons will look up to and his daughters will want their husbands to emulate.
I recognize an above average character. Yes he committed a typical male "crime," but I won't even fade myself into thinking that he's simply normal. He can't be, because he won my heart. No other man can say that really.
Yes yes, The Ex, the "Boxer" has some of my heart, but in a different sense. We have a nearly ten year relationship- friendship- built with each other. I will always have a spot for him; but, truth be told, after all those years, he doesn't know the parts of me that "my man" should know. I could never reach that level of intimacy with him. But *, he and I connect on so many levels. Not only my heart, but he captivated my mind. The Ex never had such privilege into my depths. I tried to reach his to no avail most times... Hopefully he'll grow up some day and make some woman a proud wife. If not, at the very least, he'll be great eye candy though ;-).
Honestly, it's not even his looks (though sexy he is, those thighs- so manly oommmgggg lol) that turned me on. It was/is his mind. I connected with his mind so sharply that it sent that ever so familiar tantalizing tingle straight to my ****. I'm used to men being intimidated by my own rather wide expanse of knowledge and poise. When I told * I was studying to be a doctor, instead of the usual "wow," or "oh so you're one of those smart chicks" responses, he said "People would be proud if we got together, me a lawyer or politician and you a doctor."
Tell me That Isn't Michelle and Barack all day!!! LoL...
The laughter ceases when I am cruelly reminded that he doesn't want any of that with me anymore... I'd shed a tear but my eyes are far too dry from writing this stupid Organic protocol :-(. D@*n these tear-snatching diethyl ethers and aminobenzoates!!